


Surprise Me

by cinder1013



Category: Glee
Genre: Complete, Forced Pregnancy, M/M, Mpreg, Multi, forced mating, love pistols fusion, magic spells, prostitution of a sort, sharkzilla
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-06
Updated: 2014-05-11
Packaged: 2018-01-23 18:19:37
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 9,453
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1575023
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cinder1013/pseuds/cinder1013
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kurt Hummel wasn’t special, but at least he wasn’t a monkey.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Maltese Me

**Author's Note:**

> Fusion with the manga Love Pistols (also called Sex Pistols). You can read the comic here: [Sex Pistols](http://www.mangahere.com/manga/sex_pistols/). It's a great read. 
> 
> Basic idea, madararui are people who are descended from animals other than monkeys. Many lines have died out, but some are more common than others, dogs, cats, bears. They have higher fertility rates, particularly among the light weights. Weight refers to power. A heavy weight cat might be a jaguar, a middle weight might be a bobcat, and a light weight might be a common house cat. Some less common madararui are prized for both their rarity, merfolk/fish in particular, who are the most rare. 
> 
> Note: Yes, I know people aren't descended from monkeys.

Kurt Hummel wasn’t special, but at least he wasn’t a monkey. 

Most of his friends were monkeys, but unlike most madararui, he wasn’t prejudiced. Monkeys were people too, even if they did have duller senses and weren’t aware of the Madararui world at all. It wasn’t like many madararui wanted to hang out with him. Kurt knew he was something of a disappointment. His father was a heavy weight after all and here Kurt was, a light weight. A light weight dog at that. A common one. 

So, when Karofsky called him a bitch, he really meant that. 

No wonder it had taken Blaine months to fall for him. As a middle weight brown bear from a good family, he had options. His parents were sure to arrange for him to be mated to a heavy weight of some kind. Still, Kurt had always been hopeful because they were such good friends and Blaine didn’t seem to be all that discriminate. He’d pursued that monkey, Jeremiah, after all. 

So, when they started dating, he had expected his father to be ecstatic. He hadn’t expected to get ‘the talk.’ 

His dad just looked embarrassed when he sat Kurt down in the living room for ‘the talk,’ swiping his ball cap off his head and then putting it on again. “Kurt, I know that most of our kind don’t wait long to... you know.”

Kurt blushed to the tips of his toes.

“I know we get married early. Your mother and I certainly did, but you have dreams. You can’t just settle down with the first person you meet.” 

“I don’t plan to settle down.” 

“Good.”

“And I’m not having sex, Dad. Not yet anyway.” 

His dad muttered something that sounded vaguely like ‘Yes, I can see that,’ which confused Kurt, but he wasn’t going to pursue it. 

Luckily, Blaine wanted to take it slow. Kurt wondered privately if it had something to do with him not really being a suitable mate, but really, he was glad of it, so he couldn’t complain too much. 

The first time Blaine brought Kurt home, his parents were not pleased. Kurt wasn’t exactly surprised by that, but Blaine seemed to be. Three days later, Blaine slumped into Kurt’s house and threw himself on the living room couch. 

“Are they going to make us break up?” Kurt asked. He expected himself to be more frantic about that than he was. His relationship with Blaine was nice and sweet and romantic, but lacked something he couldn’t quite put his finger on. As madararui, they released pheromones. Heavy weights could actually bring a daze to the eyes of most light weights. In fact, a strong middle weight like Blaine should have been able to also, but for some reason Kurt had never been susceptible. 

“I told them that we’re true love, that we’re going to be together forever.” Blaine turned his puppy-dog eyes on full force. 

“Of course. I love you.” Which Kurt was pretty sure he did, but he had to admit he wasn’t exactly sure what boyfriend kind of love felt like. 

“When we first walked in, they thought you were at least a middle weight because you’re so tall.” 

Kurt nodded. He was indeed tall for a light weight dog. 

“But when they found out you’re a maltese, they kind of freaked. I told them and told them...” He sighed, throwing himself back against the couch cushions dramatically. “It’s no use.”

“So, we have to break up?”

“Well, no, it’s worse. We get to stay together, but … you know that guy Sebastian?”

“The one who drives me absolutely insane?” Kurt frowned. Sebastian was a heavy weight cat and liked to throw his weight around, so to speak. He thought it amusing to see the dazed look in Kurt’s eyes when he exerted his allure. 

“Yeah. He’s not such a bad guy once you get to know him,” Blaine protested. Kurt just arched one delicate brow at that. “Maybe I’m trying to talk myself into that,” Blaine admitted. “My family is going to pay his family to give us a baby. Oh, god, I feel like such a whore.” 

“You mean they’re going to use that worm thing and …” Kurt trailed off, gesturing vaguely. Special genetics allowed madararui same-sex couples to have children. For women this hadn’t been a problem, but for men the lack of a womb posed some complications. To counteract this problem, madararui scientists bred a parasite, that when introduced to the system, grew a womb inside the male body. 

“Yeah. They’re insistent. I don’t even know if I want to get pregnant!” 

“Wait, now? Soon? You’re only 17! And we’re going to have a future, a life! We’re going to be famous! Stars!” 

“I know, I know! It’s horrible!” Blaine looked devastated. “And for that to be my first time? It’s awful.” 

Kurt thought about that for a moment, tentatively reaching out, and stroking Blaine’s arm from his elbow to wrist. “That doesn’t have to be your first time. We could...” He bit his lip. “We could.” 

“No, no. I am not letting our first time be dictated by my parents. It should happen when it’s perfect, Kurt. It should be special.” 

Kurt nodded and hugged his boyfriend. 

The build up to his first time frayed Blaine’s nerves and it was driving Kurt insane. Worse, Sebastian kept showing up at the Lima Bean during their coffee dates, all smarmy evil. Kurt hated him. There was only one other person who made Kurt feel dazed, and that was Noah Puckerman, a great white shark, about as heavy weight as they come. (Noah also thought it was hysterical to watch that dazed look appear in Kurt’s eyes, incidentally.) Kurt couldn’t be sure, but he thought Blaine’s parents might be alerting Sebastian to when they’d be at the Lima Bean, so he and Blaine arranged to meet secretly. 

It didn’t help. 

Sebastian strolled into the coffee shop, that smirk affixed on his face. 

“Seriously?” Kurt asked. “Seriously?” He huffed, leaning back in his chair, trying not to let Smythe’s aura make him dizzy. From the delirious look on Blaine’s face, he’d already lost the battle. 

“I thought you might be here, Blaine.” 

“Yeahhh.” 

Kurt crossed his arms and pulled the remaining chair at the table in with his foot, trying to prevent Sebastian from joining them. It didn’t work. Sebastian was stronger. Of course he would be. He was a tiger, after all. 

“Tsk, tsk, tsk. Bad boy, Kurt. Keep this up and I’ll have to punish you.” 

“Touch me and die.” 

“Oh, no, there will be no touching involved. I wouldn’t touch a maltese with a ten foot pole.” 

“The feeling is mutual, Smythe.” 

“May I get you some coffee?” Blaine asked with a dreamy smile. 

Kurt frowned. This was not how things were supposed to go. Blaine was a middle weight and a bear to boot. He should have been able to resist Sebastian’s allure if he’d wanted to. If. 

Sebastian nodded magnanimously. “You know my order.”

“Sure!” Like an eager cub, Blaine shot out of his chair and rushed to the counter. Sebastian watched him go, amused. 

“You know, Hummel,” he said. “I don’t get you.”

“That could be because of your incredible lack of anything resembling intelligence.” 

“You’re not attracted by the allure, but you’re a light weight bitch. You smell better than most dogs. You’re … there’s something not right about you.” 

“I think what you’re perceiving is the fact that I’m fabulous.” 

“No, that’s definitely not it.” Leaning back in his chair, Sebastian spread his legs wide and turned on his pheromones full force. “I’ve changed my mind. Why don’t you come here and suck my dick?”

Kurt coughed. The very strength was driving him crazy. Still, he wasn’t going to let this boyfriend thief win. He couldn’t. He was a Hummel and nobody pushed Hummels around. “Go fuck yourself,” he gasped out. 

Sebastian just looked intrigued. “No, I think I’ll fuck your boyfriend. After all, I’m being paid to.” He laughed. Blaine came back with the coffee and Sebastian reeled it in before Blaine did something stupid like jump him in public. “So, I was thinking, want to go out tonight?” 

“Go out?” Blaine asked, that stupid look still on his face. 

“Yeah, I thought I’d take you to this nightclub I know. It’s nice. Anonymous. Gay. We’ll have fun.” He looked pointedly at Kurt, but said to Blaine, “Your parents thought it would be an excellent idea.” It was definitely a challenge. 

Irritated, Kurt spoke up. “We’d love to. Wouldn’t we, Blaine?” He knew better than to refuse. If he was seen as an impediment to Blaine’s mating, they’d be forced to break up by Blaine’s parents. Still, he didn’t have to leave his boyfriend alone with the guy. 

“Love too,” Blaine echoed like some kind of zombie from Middlemarch. 

Kurt expected Sebastian to look annoyed, but instead he just kept smirking and if Kurt didn’t know better, he’d have thought he’d fallen into some kind of trap.


	2. Just How Dominate Are You?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sebastian takes Kurt and Blaine to Scandals. A mystery emerges.

They met Sebastian at the rather run-down looking club at 9. He was standing outside, holding out a couple of IDs for them. “Monkeys run the place,” he said. 

Kurt wrinkled his nose at that, but took the ID anyway. “Hawaii? Seriously? A Hawaiian driver’s license?” 

“Something wrong?” 

“If I didn’t know better, I’d think you didn’t want me to get in.” 

Sebastian smirked. Taking Blaine’s hand, he led Kurt’s boyfriend toward the door. Helpless to do otherwise, Kurt followed along behind. They got in without a fuss. Kurt thought the doorman was probably taking pity on them. 

Inside, Kurt kept close to Blaine. Sebastian ordered drinks for them. “Here we go,” he said, coming back with two beers and something pink. “Beer for you,” he said handing to Blaine. “Beer for me and a candy appletini for Hummel.” 

“Thanks.”

“Of course.” He smirked, watching Kurt taste the drink. It was awful, sweet and syrupy. Kurt generally didn’t like sweet things. He pushed the drink as far away from himself as he could get it, which was right in front of Blaine actually. 

Sebastian curled an arm around Blaine’s shoulders, holding him close, but he didn’t take his eyes off of Kurt. “That’s funny.”

“What?”

“Every puppy I’ve ever brought here loves that drink.” 

Kurt frowned. “I don’t like sweets.” He lifted his chin. “They just go to my hips.” 

“You do have nice hips,” Sebastian agreed with a leer. 

Blaine was sniffing at the drink in front of him, so Sebastian offered Blaine’s beer to Kurt. 

Blaine took a tentative sip and then smacked his lips before taking a bigger sip. “This is really good. I don’t know why you don’t like it, Kurt.” 

“Too sweet for me.” 

“Mmmm.” Blaine drank the whole thing. “I think that could only be better if they added honey.” 

Kurt and Sebastian both shuddered at the thought. 

“Get me another,” Blaine demanded, handing Sebastian the empty glass. 

“Sure you don’t want to dance first?”

“Yeah, Blaine, take me dancing,” Kurt ordered. 

Sebastian observed with a frown on his face as Blaine followed orders. Turning, he watched as Blaine bounced and bopped on the floor. Beside him Kurt danced with considerably more sinew and grace, his body moving in slinky curves to the music. Something was very wrong and there wasn’t much Sebastian liked more than sex, but a solving a mystery was one of them. He was going to get to the bottom of this. 

Blaine danced and drank honey sweet drinks until he was silly with it. 

“I’d better take him home before he makes a scene,” Kurt said. 

“I’ll help.”

“I got it.” Propping Blaine up, Kurt helped him stumble out. Because he was so drunk, Kurt tried to help him into the back seat so he could lay down. Blaine yanked Kurt down on top of him with surprising strength. “Blaine!”

“Let’s do it! Let’s fuck! I don’t want my first fuck to be with that whore.” 

“Let go!” 

“Kurt, Kurt, Kurt, you said you would,” Blaine whined. 

“Well, not right now.” Shoving hard, Kurt pushed Blaine away and backed out of the car. His back collided with someone - someone who smelled incredible. Kurt frowned, knowing exactly who it was. 

“Something wrong?” Sebastian asked. 

“Nothing. I’m just taking Blaine home.” 

“Home,” Blaine murmured happily, turning on his side and curling up like a two-year-old. Kurt couldn’t help smiling at him fondly. Turning to Sebastian, he expected to see the same, because how could you not smile at that, but Sebastian was frowning. 

“Something wrong?”

“You’re wrong.” 

“What?” 

“There is no way you’re a maltese or any other kind of dog for that matter. You’re lying to me. What are you?” 

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Kurt turned to go, but Sebastian grabbed his arm, spinning him back and pushing him against the car. 

“I love a mystery, but I need some clues here. Otherwise it’s just not fair, Daphne.” 

“Well, let me enlighten you, Shaggy. I’m a dog. I’m a silly little light weight disappointment to my friends and family. There is no mystery. None. I’m not deflecting. I’m not showing you a false soul. This is me.” 

Sebastian grinned at him. “No, it’s not, but I thought you knew. You don’t, do you?”

“Know what?” 

“Daph, I can’t wait til you find out. You get Scooby home safe. Next week, I’m supposed to impregnate him and I will, but you’re coming with him. And I do mean coming.” 

“You can’t do that. You can’t make me.” 

“Make you? What? You’re just going to leave poor Blainers alone and defenseless with this big bad dominate who he’s, let’s admit it, hopelessly attracted to. You’re going to do that?” Licking his lips, Sebastian grinned at him and Kurt could see a bit of his soul, the big tiger teeth peeking through his gums. He was showing off, reminding Kurt that he was a heavy weight.

Straightening up, Kurt got right in his face. “I won’t remain outside the room. You’re going to have to deal with my pasty face and scrawny body. But then, a whore like you probably puts up with fucking unattractive people all the time.” 

“You’re saying I can fuck you?”

“What? No!” 

Sebastian took the opportunity of the proximity to wrap himself around Kurt, not trapping him, but forcing him to realize how close they were and just how intimate their position, their hips pressed together, their breath snaking over each other’s lips. “I want to. I want to find out what’s hiding in here,” he said, tapping Kurt’s chest. 

“There is nothing hiding but a yip dog!” 

“Oh, but I think you’re wrong.” With a wink and smirk, he pulled away, leaving Kurt panting, his breath visible in the cold night air. “We’re going to find out and when we do, you’re going to be mine.” 

“I’m with Blaine.” 

“Mine, Daph. All mine.” Turning on his heel, Sebastian strolled back into the club. 

Kurt let loose a few choice expletives he wouldn’t have used in polite company and then circled the car to get in. Blaine snored softly in the backseat. Turning to him, Kurt could see so much that he loved about him, his sweet face and soft lips. He was obviously dreaming, squirming slightly in his sleep, a smile pasted on his face. “Kurt,” he whispered and Kurt’s heart did a little dance of joy just hearing it.


	3. What's the Point of Cake if You Don't Eat It

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sebastian insists on having his cake and eating it too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Note: Madararui can basically transform, something monkeys cannot do. They can do so partially, like Blaine's bear ears being visible, or fully, as in Puck can become a great white shark. It amuses Puck to go swimming in a lake and surprise boaters.

He wasn’t going to leave Blaine alone with that predator and he knew it. He dreaded it, honestly. Sebastian made him nervous in a way that no one else ever had. 

With a sigh, he tore his eyes away from Blaine and started the car. 

When he got home, his father was waiting up for him. Oh, great. 

“Dad?” He was carrying Blaine cradled in his arms. “Can I just carry him up to bed? There won’t be any funny business. I promise.” 

Burt nodded. 

Kurt went up and tucked his boyfriend into bed. When he came back down, Burt was waiting, sitting in his favorite recliner. Kurt sat near him on the couch. “Is this an intervention?” 

“Of sorts. I just want you to know how you are. You’ve been dating Blaine for a while now. What am I lookin’ at here? Wedding in July?” 

“Hardly. His parents hate me.” 

“Maybe you two should just have sex,” Burt said, much too casually. 

Kurt blushed to the tips of his ears. “How do you know we haven’t?”

“A good guess.” 

“I do not want to know why you’re guessing about my sex life. Honestly, Dad, I don’t want to think about you thinking about it at all.” 

“Look, Kurt, you’re getting older. By now, at this point in my life, your mother and I were already planning our wedding.” 

“Yes, well, you are a lot more desirable. I’m sure she was thrilled to be getting married to a heavy weight.” He frowned. “What was Mom? I always assumed she was a small dog like me, but …” He stared at her picture that sat on the mantle across the room. In it, his mother was smiling and for the first time he noticed just how many teeth she had. A lot. Almost like Puckerman. 

“Your mother was a very special, very beautiful woman. Why don’t you get up to bed? It’s late. I won’t ask where you two were, but you’re alright?” 

“I’m fine.”

“You’ve got tiger scent all over you.” 

Kurt blushed. “It’s that guy Blaine’s family paid to knock him up. Isn’t that awful? Forcing Blaine to-”

“You were both out with him?”

“Blaine’s parents want him to have some bonding time. I assume it’s because they hope he’ll fall for the tiger. They want him to marry up.”

“That’s sad.”

“Marrying up?” 

“Not allowing your kid to be who he wants and marry who he wants.”

He and his dad shared a smile. 

“Now, get up to bed.”

“Yes, Dad.” Only after Kurt snuggled into bed with his boyfriend did he realize that his father hadn’t answered his question about his mom. 

This was stupid. She must have been a maltese. Otherwise he’d be something else. Yes, congen, otherwise known as genetic types or genetic souls, could skip a generation sometimes, but usually not outside of the genus. So, his parents were both canines and that made him a canine. Still, something niggled at him. There was just something wrong with it all. But what?

Blaine’s ears popped out while he was sleeping. It was too cute. They were wiggling slightly, twitching with his dreams. Leaning forward, Kurt planted a kiss on his curls, held his boyfriend close and fell asleep. Blaine clung to him, murmuring about how good he smelled. 

In the morning, Blaine’s parents summoned him home to tell them how his ‘date’ went and give him a chance for more ‘bonding time’ with Sebastian in the afternoon. They made it very clear that Kurt was not welcome to attend ‘bonding time.’ 

So, it surprised Kurt when his phone rang around 2pm. 

“Where are you?” Sebastian asked, without even bothering to say hello. 

“So pleasant to speak to you, Mr. Smythe. Aren’t you supposed to be seducing my boyfriend?” 

“Hold on, I’m putting you on speakerphone.” There was a click and then Sebastian’s voice was back. “This is what I want, when I’m visiting Blaine, I want to see Kurt too.” 

“This is preposterous,” a woman’s voice complained. Kurt assumed it was Blaine’s mom. 

“I like seeing Kurt,” Blaine offered. 

“Of course you do,” Sebastian told him. “I like seeing Kurt too and from now on, there is no deal unless Kurt is involved.” 

“I’m not some whore like you are,” Kurt told them calmly. “I’m not interested.” 

“Kuuurrrrt,” Blaine complained. 

Kurt could feel a headache coming on. Pinching the bridge of his nose, he amended his words. “I only want to be there if Blaine wants me there.”

“I want you here!” 

“This is completely inappropriate!” Mrs. Anderson complained. 

“It’s not like I’m charging you extra,” Sebastian snapped. “Now, Kurt, how fast can you drive? Because there’s no point to this meeting without you.” 

So, Kurt drove to Westerville, muttering to himself the entire way. When he arrived at the Anderson household, it was a sullen Mrs. Anderson who showed him into the parlor. Sebastian rose as soon as he walked in. Kurt edged around him and went to his boyfriend. Taking Blaine’s hands he whispered, “Hey, I’m here.” 

“Hi.” 

“About time you showed up,” Sebastian complained, flopping back into the armchair. “Good to know you got home safe last night.” 

Sitting with his boyfriend, Kurt cuddled him close, his arm thrown around Blaine’s shoulders. “I’m sure Blaine already told you that.” It was odd, he admitted to himself. Their positions really should be reversed since Blaine was a middle weight. Of course, Blaine was also very cuddly, so it was possible that’s all it was. 

“Want to go up to my room?” Blaine asked. “We can listen to music and stuff.” 

“Now, wait a minute-” Mrs. Anderson began, but Sebastian cut her off. 

“Sounds like a great idea. Come on.” 

“Blaine won’t be fertile for another three days,” she reminded Sebastian as they walked out of the room. He waved off her concern. 

“Geez, I thought they wanted us to bond,” he complained. 

“She does seem a bit ditzy about this,” Kurt admitted. 

“They’re upset to be doing this at all,” Blaine said. “Come on, I can’t explain out here. Let’s get to my room.” 

As soon as the door to his room shut, Blaine sighed in relief. “They’re driving me crazy. I know it’s normal for our kind to get married and pregnant early because of the low fertility rates, but this is starting to be insane.” He glanced at Sebastian. “You trying to rape my boyfriend is not helping.” 

“Rape? Excuse me?”

“He’ll do anything for me because he loves me and you’re using that against him.” Blaine stayed across the room, plastering himself into the corner so Sebastian’s allure wouldn’t affect him as much. 

Crossing to him, Kurt wrapped his arms around Blaine, hugging him close. “You’re right, but I will. I’ll do anything for you.” 

“It’s just wrong. All of this is so wrong.” He shook his head. “I like you Seb, I do. I don’t understand why you have to put Kurt through this.” 

Sebastian just looked stunned. 

Sitting down in the chair across from the bed, Kurt pulled Blaine into his lap. “I don’t know why your parents have to put you through this. Is it any less of coercion?” 

“Hey, I’m not the guilty party in that...this...the Blaine part,” Sebastian protested. 

“But I do want to be here when it happens,” Kurt admitted, ignoring Sebastian. “And if I am and Sebastian is willing, I’ll probably be sucked into all the hormones and pheromones flying around. I think that’s unavoidable.” He kissed Blaine softly. “It’s not just because I love you and want to support you and all those nice things. I’m jealous too.”

“Oh.” Blaine brightened up hearing that. 

“And...” Kurt bit his lip. “I think Seb might be right.”

“Right about what?”

“I think there’s something wrong with me.” He took a deep breath. “You’re sitting in my lap, Blaine.”

“I like sitting in your lap.” 

“I know. You do it all the time. I like it too. Doesn’t that tell you something?” 

Blaine shook his head. “That I’m a cuddly bear?” Kurt had to giggle when he heard that. 

Sebastian approached them, his feet as silent as big cat paws. Carefully, he slide his hand up Blaine’s spine to the back of his neck. Kurt watched, wary, but allowing it. “Kurt is right. It’s not normal. He should be smaller. And he should be in your lap. When’s the last time you saw his congen?” 

Blaine blushed. “We’re kind of private. I don’t think we’ve ever seen one another’s...” He gestured vaguely.

“When he was sleeping, after he got drunk at Scandals, his ears popped out.”

“I bet they were cute.”

“Absolutely adorable.” 

Sebastian smiled, a real smile, not his usual smirk. “Will you please come over to the bed so we can both cuddle Blaine? I promise not to try to lure you in.” 

Kurt nodded. Standing, he carried Blaine over to the bed. 

Blaine frowned. “I see what you mean.” 

“So, Sherlock,” Kurt teased, “what do you think it means?” 

“Sometimes parents of rare species ward their children, causing them to display as monkeys until they come of age,” Sebastian suggested. “While you aren’t a monkey, maybe you aren’t a maltese either, which would be a good thing. Those little yip dogs are just annoying.”

“Oh, Sebastian, how sweet of you. You’re saying I’m not annoying?” 

“You’re very annoying, but not in the same way.” 

Blaine snuggled between them as they lay on the bed. If he’d been a cat, he would have been purring. 

“It still doesn’t make sense,” Kurt argued. 

“And why not, Watson?” 

“I am not your Watson. I am definitely Moriarty. Or L. I could be L,” Kurt told him. Sebastian snorted at that, but let the comment pass. “It doesn’t make sense because as a brown bear, Blaine is among the heavier middle weights. I would have to be a heavy weight to be dominating him like this, but I can’t be that because I’m affected by you the way I am. So, you must be wrong.” 

“I am never wrong.” Sebastian sighed and turned on his back, his hand still playing with Blaine’s hair. “But, you have a point. To make my theory work, Blaine would have to be spelled also.” 

“I’ve seen his ears.” 

Sebastian frowned at that. “I’ll figure it out. I will. I hate an unsolved mystery.” He looked down. “I think Blaine is asleep.” 

“He’s a snuggly bear,” Kurt said fondly, running his fingers through Blaine’s curls.

“He is. Listen, he’s special and I don’t want to give him up. This isn’t about the money.” 

“Well, you can’t have him and I’ll fight you for him.” 

Sebastian laughed, covering his mouth with his hand, trying to be silent. “That wasn’t where I was going with that comment, but that’s cute that you think you could take me on.”

Kurt lifted his chin. “Sometimes it’s just important to try.” 

“Fuck, you turn me on. I was going to say that I can’t give him up. I won’t. And I won’t give you up either. I want you both. Can you … will you … it’s what I want and I want to know if you want it too.” 

Kurt thought about that, playing with Blaine’s curls. They were full of gel and he was going to have to wash his fingers thoroughly later, but it proved a good distraction. “I’m grateful, you know. I don’t want you to think I’m not,” he said, finally. 

“Grateful for what?” Reaching across, Sebastian stilled his hand and pulled it into his own, then dropped it immediately. “Eww, hair gel.” Kurt laughed as Sebastian tried to wipe the gooey stuff off of his trousers. “That stuff has got to go.” Looking up, he met Kurt’s eyes. “You didn’t answer the question.” 

“It was more fun watching you squirm.” 

“Answer the question, grateful for what?”

Kurt looked away, but he made sure his answer sounded calm. “Not just taking Blaine away. You don’t need me, after all. Whatever this mystery is, I doubt the result is going to be some big revelation.” He shook his head. “I don’t want that, though. I don’t want your pity.” 

“Pity? What the fuck? Pity?” 

“Don’t wake Blaine.” 

“Too late,” Blaine murmured. “Why are we talking about pity?”

Sebastian sat up. “Kurt thinks I pity him.” 

“Don’t you?”

“It couldn’t be farther from the truth. You’re strong, you’re pretty … sure, you sound like you’ve been sucking helium when you talk, but we all have our faults.”

Blaine tried not to laugh at that. Kurt frowned at him. 

“I don’t pity you. I want you, both of you. You just … you come as a set. You shouldn’t come any other way and to try to separate the two of you or even contemplate the two of you apart is just wrong. It’s like morally wrong or something.” 

Kurt wanted to make a snide comment about Sebastian and morals, but he honestly couldn’t think of one. 

“So?” Sebastian asked. 

“What is he asking?” Blaine wanted to know. “That was so beautiful.”

“I know, Blaine-bear.” Pulling Blaine back against him, Kurt regarded him carefully. “You really mean it, don’t you?”

“I do.” 

“Then I accept.” 

Sebastian actually smiled, another real smile. Maybe he wasn’t just pitying Kurt. “Now,” he said, “I’m going to go wash my hands. The hair gel has to go, Blainers.” 

“Don’t call me that and do you have any idea what my hair looks like without it?” 

“We’re going to find out.” 

“You really, really do not want to do that. Trust me. It’s bad. It’s a very bad thing.” He turned to his boyfriend. “Tell him, Kurt.”

“I’ve never seen your hair without gel in it.” 

“There’s a reason for that.” 

Sebastian smirked. Turning on his allure just slightly, he suggested in his best bedroom voice, “Wouldn’t you like to take a shower and wash all that out?”

“Shower?” Blaine asked, lost in Sebastian’s spell. 

“Sebastian! Don’t try to manipulate my boyfriend like that!” 

“Don’t you mean _our_ boyfriend?” he suggested with a leer. 

“I...” Kurt thought about that for a moment. “I suppose I’ll share him with you, but only because you asked with slightly less smirk than usual.” 

“This is less smirk?”

“Slightly.” 

Leaning over Blaine, he kissed Kurt hard. “I love it when you’re bitchy.” 

“You must. It’s about all that I am.” 

“No, no,” Blaine protested, struggling to free himself from the allure. “You’re all lovely.” 

Kurt giggled. “Thank you, cuddly bear.” 

“I am cuddly. Cuddle me.” Blaine ordered and wrapped himself around Kurt. 

There was a knock at the door. Sebastian got up to answer it. “Mrs. Anderson?” 

“I wanted to see if you boys needed anything or if perhaps Kurt was ready to go home.” 

“No,” Blaine protested and snuggled Kurt harder. Kurt hugged him back. 

“I thought I was very clear, Mrs. Anderson,” Sebastian told her with barely a pretence at politeness. “Kurt will be joining us, Blaine and I. He has agreed to it.” 

“Well, I … it is important that you are the one to -”

“Like I would allow Kurt to impregnate Blaine first. Not for several years, at least.” Sebastian quirked his lip and a fang peeked through. “Are we quite finished?” He didn’t give her a chance to answer, just shut the door. 

“Several years?” Kurt asked, amused. 

“Optimism isn’t a bad thing.” He shrugged. “Besides, we’ve all got dreams. I don’t think we want to expand our family too soon.” 

Kurt knew madararui mated and formed families early, often very unconventional families, but this was like a whirlwind. Still, Sebastian smelled so, so good and it was a relief to give in. Holding out an arm, he silently invited Sebastian to come and cuddle. 

“I haven’t ever done this before, you know,” Sebastian whispered. 

“You haven’t?” 

“I’m not a whore.” 

Leaning over Kurt kissed him, soft and tender. “I know. We both know.” Blaine nodded and kissed him too. 

“Besides,” Sebastian smirked, “I don’t seem to be very good at it if the first boy I’m paid to impregnate, I fall for. And his boyfriend.” They cuddled Sebastian close and the three of them all drifted off to sleep.


	4. It's all in the allure, baby!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's time to get Blaine pregnant. 
> 
> Which means sex. Lots of sex.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Note: Remember that madararui can show their soul animal in part or completely.

They didn’t have to, but they waited for Blaine to be fertile. It gave them some time to become more comfortable with the situation. It also gave Kurt time to tell his father. 

“You’re quite sure he’s the one?” his dad asked. “He’s worthy of you?” 

“Yeah, Dad, this is a good thing. Something is going to change after this, isn’t it?” 

“Well, the three of you will be having a baby over the summer. I’d say that’s a big change.” Burt grinned. “I can’t wait to spoil my grandbaby.” 

Kurt laughed. “That’s not quite what I meant though.” 

Burt patted Kurt on the shoulder. “If I promise you it’s a good surprise, can we agree to keep it one?” 

“I suppose. When I find out what this surprise is, I’ll understand?” 

“You will.” 

It also gave Kurt time to plan their evening, for which Kurt demanded that Sebastian hand over his credit card. 

“Does he always do this?” Sebastian asked Blaine. 

“Be afraid. Be very afraid.” 

“It’s not like I’m taking it to the mall,” Kurt protested. 

“Do you know how much my mother bitched me out about Valentine’s Day?” 

“Yes, because you’ve told me repeatedly.” 

Sebastian smiled indulgently and handed over his credit card with a flourish. “If there’s not enough money on that one, pick something cheaper.” 

“Tightwad.” 

“You bet.” 

They met on Friday in one of the more beautiful hotel rooms Sebastian had ever seen, and that was saying something. It was a suite with a large bath, the tub big enough to fit the three of them. There was also a dining room table with the most delightful smelling dinner laid out on it. Kurt, it seemed, spared no expense. Probably because the money wasn’t his. Still, Sebastian really couldn’t grumble too much. This was going to make their first time together special. 

The bed was simply divine. A lush, velvety, red duvet covered a larger than king size bed. It seemed like there were a million pillows on it, pillows he could use to prop Blaine up so he could fuck him harder, lean Kurt over them and spread out those long, pale limbs. 

“I like it.” 

“Oh good, because you paid for it,” Kurt told him, handing him back his credit card. “If there’s a limit on that card, I couldn’t find it.” 

“You did try, didn’t you?”

“Of course I did,” Kurt told him with a sniff. “Shall we have dinner?” He opened the wine and poured half a glass for Blaine. “Not too much, but this will help you relax.” 

Sebastian took the bottle and poured his own glass, then took a seat at the head of the table. “Kurt, you know the way to my heart.”

“Do I?” 

“Shamelessly appealing to my hedonism.” 

“I thought it would be by sucking it out through your dick,” Kurt admitted. 

“That’s a viable method as well, although tonight I intend to find out exactly what the two of you look like when you come.”

Blaine took a big gulp of wine.

Giving him a fond look, Kurt admitted, “I want to see you come too, Blaine-bear.” 

“Me too … er, I mean, both of you. You too. I need more wine.” Blaine took another long swallow. 

“I don’t know if I can eat,” Sebastian admitted. “He looks too good. Too ripe.” Indeed, Blaine did have a glow about him. Probably the side effect of the parasite used to grow a temporary womb so that he could be impregnated.

Kurt frowned. “I hate to see it go to waste. This is supposed to be one of the best tasting meals in the state.” 

“We’ll have them remake it later.” He poured a glass of wine for Kurt and offered it to him. “It’ll help.” 

“I’m not nervous.” Indeed, Kurt was so calm he almost felt detached. 

“Just drink it. It’ll make me happy.” 

“Well, for you then.” Kurt saluted him with the glass before taking an experimental sip. The wine was a Pinot Noir, velvety smooth on his tongue. He took another sip and thought briefly about becoming an expert on wine. It would suit his future goals to have a wine collection. 

Sebastian downed the rest of his wine and then came around the table, taking Blaine’s hand and helping him up from his chair. “Kurt, this time I want you to just watch.” He gestured to a chair beside the bed. “You know why?”

“Because I might interfere with trying to impregnate Blaine?” 

“Still struggling with the word ‘impregnate’,” Blaine admitted. Kurt handed him his wine so Blaine could have another few sips. 

“Well, yes, kind of actually. The way I’m going to have you squirming all over the bed,” he told Blaine, holding him close, “is going to make Kurt want to take you next. I can’t allow that until I’m already sure you’re already pregnant.” Blaine nodded eagerly. Sebastian’s pheromones were starting to leak out and for once Kurt let himself drift along on them rather than fighting it. “But it’s also because I want to give my sole focus to each of you for your first time.” Kurt nodded. He didn’t feel threatened like he had before and he wondered how much that was because he believed Sebastian and how much was because of being high on Sebastian’s allure. 

Kurt started to settle in the chair, but Sebastian stopped him. “That doesn’t mean you should stay clothed.” He turned to Blaine. “Would you like to undress Kurt?” 

Blaine grinned bright enough to light suns. Setting aside the wine glass, he turned on Kurt, starting to unbutton, unsnap, and unzip enthusiastically. Perhaps too enthusiastically. “Blaine, you’re going to rip it.” Kurt batted his hands away and continued unbuttoning on his own. 

Blaine’s hands dropped to Kurt’s zipper. “Before we … you know, me and Sebastian on the bed, I want to suck you. I’ve, uh, dreamed about it a lot.” 

Sebastian laid back on the bed, watching the scene play out, his eyes hungry. “You two have never...?” He gestured between them.

“Never touched below the waist, but that changes tonight.” Kurt fixed his gaze on Blaine, waiting as Blaine sank to his knees. 

“I want to. I’ve wanted to for a long time.” Opening Kurt’s jeans, Blaine leaned in and licked up and down. covering his briefs with spit. “Let me suck you?” 

Kurt marveled for a moment. He certainly wasn’t a lighter weight than Blaine. Whatever was going on, that was definitely true. “Yes.” He slipped his briefs over his hips, revealing his cock. “C’mon, Blaine.” 

“Yes, Blaine, suck it. Suck Kurt,” Sebastian ordered, opening his pants and stroking his cock while he watched Blaine devour Kurt’s cock. He went at it like a starving man, like someone who’d been dreaming of this for forever. And truly, he had for a very long time. 

It was insanely hot to watch and Sebastian rubbed his palm over his erection. “Don’t let him come,” he finally said.

“But why?” Blaine whined. 

Kurt pulled him up and pushed him toward the bed. “I want to watch the two of you. I want to … you know … while I watch.” 

“Say it, Kurt,” Sebastian ordered, his allure settling heavy on the room, affecting both of his boyfriends. 

“While you take his virginity. While you’re inside him.” 

Sebastian’s eyes were wide and dark. He nodded his agreement. Grabbing Blaine’s hand, he pulled the smaller man onto the bed. “You can take my clothes off now too.” With trembling hands, Blaine did just that. 

Kurt sat in the armchair, pulling up his long legs to sit cross-legged. He firmly attached his hands to the chair arms, digging his fingers in until the knuckles were white. 

Naked Sebastian was a sight to behold, long limbed, tan, with a sprinkling of hair over his legs. The three of them complimented one another well, each sharing a quality in common and another in contrast. 

Blaine was more compact and strong. His muscles weren’t deceptive like Kurt’s, they were prominent, wrapping around his arms in delicious looking bulges that Kurt wanted to lick. Unlike his boyfriends, he was much more hirsute. He had a good amount of chest hair, which Kurt found very sexy. In general, he was in favor of chest hair. 

So did Sebastian. “I like,” he said, plucking at the black hairs on Blaine’s chest, tugging them just enough to sting, but not enough to hurt. His tongue followed, flicking over Blaine’s nipples, pulling a squeaky groan from him. “We need to make Kurt come. Do you know how we’re going to do that?” Blaine shook his head. “He’s going to get so hot watching us that he’ll spontaneously combust.” Both boys groaned. “Are you watching, Kurt?” 

“Yes. Lick him some more?” 

“Oh, I will.” Which he proceeded to do zealously, worshiping Blaine’s body, forcing more and more pleasure on him. Blaine could only moan and groan, opening himself to it, overwhelmed. 

“Kurt?” Sebastian asked, pausing for just a moment. “Isn’t he beautiful?”

“Yes, oh yes.” 

“When I tell you, you’re going to start stroking your cock, but you do not come until I tell you to.” 

Kurt nodded, frantically. 

“And I will invite you to bed when I’m ready. It may take some time, alright?” He lifted his head, looking Kurt right in the eye. “This is important. I don’t want to hurt you because of some stupid tiger instincts.” 

Kurt paused for just a moment, then nodded again. 

“Good.” Sebastian went back to driving Blaine insane with his tongue, kissing down the furry trail on his belly to his cock, engulfing it in his mouth. Blaine would have thrust upward. He wanted to. His body begged him to, but Sebastian’s hands held his hips firmly against the mattress. He finally pulled his mouth away. “I can’t prepare you if you’re thrusting like that, baby.” Blaine babbled about being good, trying hard to keep his hips on the mattress as Sebastian trailed two fingers covered with lube between his cheeks. He circled Blaine’s hole for a moment, then thrust them inside. 

“Fuck!” Blaine shoved his hips back to meet those fingers. Kurt knew from a very inappropriate conversation late at night that Blaine fingered himself often while jerking off. After the discussion, Kurt started doing it too. He just hoped they were prepared for Sebastian’s very impressive cock. 

It wasn’t like watching porn, not that Kurt knew a lot about that, but he’d seen some. Porn involved getting a good shot. This was all about pleasure and pleasure wasn’t always easy to see. It didn’t put on a show for observers. All of Sebastian’s attention was concentrated on Blaine, making him moan and groan and squirm and beg. Sebastian’s allure fogged the room. 

Insanely hot, better than any porn.

Kurt clenched the chair arms tight, forcing himself not to touch. 

Sebastian’s allure clouded the room, his scent making both boys drool. Pulling his mouth off Blaine’s cock with a pop, he looked up. “You’re beautiful, Blaine. You ready for me?” 

“Yes, yes, please! Please, please, please!” He shook with need. 

“You’re going to come on my cock, aren’t you?” 

“Yes, yes, yes!” 

He glanced over at the boy in the chair. “You ready?” 

“Fuck him! Please, please fuck him!” 

“I love hearing that pretty mouth of yours swear.” With a smirk, he knelt up and tilted Blaine’s hips, then slowly pushed inside. “Blaine? You like that?” Blaine, his eyes scrunched up tight against the pleasure, could only groan, trying to thrust his hips back even farther onto Sebastian’s cock. Lost in the pleasure. Lost in the allure. 

“Kurt, you can touch your cock now, but don’t you come until I tell you to or I’ll have to give you a good spanking before I fuck that tight ass of yours.” 

Kurt groaned at the thought, but he still kept his touch on his cock light, gently tapping his fingertips up and down. 

Sebastian stopped teasing, lifting Blaine’s legs and fucking him hard and fast. “You’ll feel this in the morning,” Sebastian promised. 

“Please! Oh, yes, please!” Blaine babbled. “Want, want, want!” He was so far gone, he could only shake his head from side to side and babble. Sebastian slipped his arms around Blaine’s back, holding him tight as he slammed into him. Suddenly, Blaine arched back, coming with a soundless scream, his eyes rolling up in his head. Kurt was next, spurting into his own hand, over his belly. When Sebastian smelled it, his hips stuttered before thrusting into Blaine as hard as he could and coming. 

He collapsed, sweaty and gross, on top of Blaine, who didn’t seem to mind 1 bit. 

All Kurt could do was sit, watching them, as he started to shiver from the chilly night air. He didn’t dare rise or move too much. Sebastian’s tiger senses were on full alert. At this moment, he would be closest to his soul animal. Beneath Sebastian, he could see Blaine’s bear ears had popped out again as he nuzzled contentedly into Sebastian’s neck. 

Blaine was a bear. This mystery still made no sense.


	5. My, What Sharp Teeth You Have

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Where-in we finally find out what Kurt and Blaine are. 
> 
> **Just an epilogue left after this.

It was the movement of his arms that gained Sebastian’s attention, when he finally wrapped them around himself to get warm. 

“Hey.” Sebastian held out his hand. Kurt took it and climbed into bed. 

“Can I touch him?” Kurt asked, his fingers hovering near Blaine's curls. 

“Yeah. Those ears don’t look like a brown bear, do they?” 

Looking closer, Kurt realized that they didn’t. They were small, white, and not really round. They were more triangular really. He wasn’t sure quite what kind of bear they were. “They are cute.” He grinned, ruffling Blaine’s curls, curls they’d thankfully convinced him to leave ungelled tonight. With a huge yawn, Blaine gave 1 last nuzzle and then pulled away from Sebastian, drowsy, lounging. 

“Don’t mind me,” he said. “Feel free to ... you know.” He blushed. 

“If you’ve done the deed, you should be able to say it,” Sebastian chided. 

“You want to watch Sebastian fuck me?” Kurt asked, leaning over for a lazy kiss, but keeping the bulk of Sebastian between them. He’s very conscious of the tiger claws Sebastian was having trouble putting away. 

“Yeah,” Blaine whispered, blushing. 

“I think we should give him what he wants,” Sebastian said. Sitting up, he grabbed a bolster and manhandled Kurt until he was laying over it, his ass in the air. “And I did promise you a spanking.” 

“Wait!”

But Sebastian didn’t. A stinging slap snapped against Kurt’s right ass cheek. “Such a pretty ass.” He let loose another, making both Kurt and Blaine moan. “Think you’re going to need these a lot to keep you in line.” 

“Hah! You can’t expect me to - oh, fuck!” More smacks rained down on his ass, making him lose his train of thought. They didn’t hurt so much as sting, hot. His skin felt tight and tingly. Spreading wider, he arched up into them. “Oh, please!” Slaps on the insides of his thighs took him by surprise. 

“Beg me more.” 

“Please, Sebastian! Please fuck me! I’ve wanted you to ... always ... I mean ... oh fuck!” 

“Always?” Sebastian asked, rubbing long fingers over heated skin, making everything tingle with the kind of warmth Kurt couldn’t squirm away. “Tell me about it.” 

“Fuck you! Just -” He yelped as a real slap smacked his sore ass. 

“Now, that’s not nice. Tell me about how you’ve always wanted me.” 

“Like you need to add more to your ego,” Kurt snapped back. 

“Tell me you’re not just here for Blaine,” he growled, his fingers clenching tight. 

Sitting up a little, Kurt pushed Sebastian back so he could turn over. “You think I’d ever have let you bully me into a relationship? Seriously? I always had options, Smythe. I chose this,” he said. Wrapping his arms around Sebastian’s neck he pulled the other man close. “I’m more clever than you take me for.” 

“Yeah?”

“Yeah and I want you. And you want me too.” Kurt squirmed around on the pillow he was sitting on. “So, would you fuck me already? I just ...” Falling back into the pillows, he pulled Sebastian with him. “You got my ass all hot and now you had better fuck me hard!” 

“So demanding,” Sebastian chided, but the glint was back in his eyes and his allure was starting to slither its way through the room again. 

“I’m not going to beg you. You’re going do as I say,” Kurt told him, with a smirk. 

“And why is that?” 

Kurt’s hand slipped down, his long fingers stroking Sebastian’s hard cock. “Because you’re gagging for it.” 

Growling, Sebastian slapped Kurt’s hand away and shoved him down on the bed. “Idiot. You’re stupid to antagonize me.” 

“I’m smart if it gets me what I want,” Kurt teased back with a smirk. On the edge of his vision, he could sense Blaine a little, but Sebastian’s allure consumed him. It made him hungry. Licking over Sebastian’s lips made 1 of his fangs pop out. Kurt sucked it between his lips. 

“Kurt,” Sebastian growled, pulling away. “Don’t antagonize me.” He shifted, carefully sliding a lube coated finger into Kurt. “You’re a virgin.”

“Oh! Not for ... oh!” 

“Yeah, not for long,” he promised, using all his concentration to carefully stretch. 

Kurt couldn’t stop squirming. He’d fingered himself before and he knew he liked it. This was even better. Sebastian’s certainly knew what he was doing, his long fingers searching out Kurt’s prostrate and rubbing against it until Kurt bucked his hips, then pulling away. Giving just enough and not too much. Kurt’s body slid sinuously against the bedding. 

Finally, “Ready?” Sebastian whispered in his ear. 

“Yes! Do it already! Stupid ti-” Kurt sucked in his breath as Sebastian slowly slid inside, throwing his head back, exposing his throat to his powerful lover. 

“I could say something about who’s stupid,” Sebastian grunted, “but then I couldn’t have fun watching this.” Pulling back, he thrust forward sharply. “Oh, yes, you were - saying - something?” he asked, punctuating each word with a powerful thrust. 

Kurt shook his head, lost in the allure and the feel of Sebastian inside him, taking every last vestige of his virginity. Sebastian’s balls slapped against his ass in a steady rhythm. 

“May I?” Blaine asked, reaching out to touch Kurt’s cock. 

“Oh, please,” Kurt whispered, unable to summon more air. 

“Make him come.” 

Eagerly, Blaine slid his fingers around Kurt’s cock, feeling it, playing with it a little before slowly stroking it. 

“Harder!” Kurt ordered. “Blaine, please! Grip me harder! Jerk me faster!”

Startled, Blaine did and Sebastian sped up his strokes too, pushing Kurt over the edge, making him come with a scream. That seemed to be enough for Sebastian, who came with a roar and then collapsed, rolling at the last minute so he was between Blaine and Kurt on the bed rather squashing anyone. 

“We will sleep for a year,” Sebastian announced, yawning, his jaw cracking, showing off all his teeth. 

“Need shower,” Kurt muttered, but he was already drifting off. Blaine clung to Sebastian’s back, reaching over him and pulling Kurt closer. 

When Kurt woke again, it was still dark. Slipping from the bed, he padded to the bathroom. He was seriously rank and sticky, 2 things that needed to be taken care of immediately. The water would soothe his aches. It always healed him. When he’d been the subject of Karofsky’s ire, every bruise always seemed to disappear after he bathed. He wondered how much better that worked for ...

“OMG!” Kurt stared at himself the in mirror. There he was, his soul clear to see and it was most certainly not a maltese. Not even a dog at all. “I’m! I’m!” 

“Kurt!” Blaine was beside him in a second. “Kurt?” 

Kurt pointed a shaky hand at the mirror. “Blaine-bear, I think you’re actually a ... something,” he informed his boyfriend as calmly as possible. Blaine looked. His soul was clear as well, and if Kurt was right, it was a red panda. 

“Yeah, umm, I’m pretty sure we’re in the weasel family,” Blaine said, a frown on his face. 

“So the two of us fit right in with Sebastian.” Kurt turned from side to side, admiring himself. “My fins are pretty," he said, admiring the sleek shark with it's tan body and black tipped fins. "I can't believe I'm a shark. Do you think Puck will let me go swimming with him? He likes to pop out of the water and scare boaters." 

Blaine just pouted. 

"Blaine-bear," he whispered, turning to his boyfriend. 

"I'm not even a bear!" Blaine stomped back to bed. Sebastian lounged there, his bedhead epic. "I'm not a bear," Blaine said before Sebastian could even open his mouth. 

"You look like a red raccoon," Sebastian told him with a sleepy grin. 

Kurt stepped to the side so Sebastian wouldn't see him yet. Blaine's reaction to finding out he wasn't even a bear bothered him, like it changed who he was. Did it? Did finding out he was really a shark change who Kurt was? 

"You're so cute," Sebastian cooed. "Come here so I can cuddle you." 

"Maybe I'm not cuddly," Blaine said, crossing his arms. "Ever think of that? I'm not even a bear. Maybe I'm not a cuddly whatever ... weasel or what not." 

OK, this just had to stop. 

"You're a red panda," Kurt told him, coming out of the bathroom and wrapping his arms around Blaine from behind. He shot their boyfriend, Sebastian, a significant look. He prayed Sebastian had the social intelligence of at least a rock. 

"Whoa, you're a shark. I knew it!" 

Apparently not. 

"I doubt I'm even a predator," Blaine griped. 

Pushing him onto the bed, Kurt crawled after him, wrapping Blaine up between himself and Sebastian. "You've never been a predator, baby. Just because we know you're a red panda instead of a brown bear, doesn't change who you are. You're still cuddly and kind and gregarious and lovely." He waited a moment and then kicked Sebastian's thigh. "Right?"

"Ow. I'm still getting over being completely right. And you scoffed when I suggested you were both bespelled." Laying back, smug, he folded his arms behind his head. "Admit it. I'm the greatest, the smartest, and the best in bed." 

"You're a tiger in the sack," Blaine said with a completely straight face. Kurt giggled and after a moment Blaine helplessly followed. 

"Hey, I think you 2 are making fun of me." 

Kurt ignored him. "See? You're still the cheesy goofball I love." 

Blaine began humming _Silly Love Songs._ Softly, Kurt joined him. 

"Oh fuck me, group singing. Please tell me we don't have to sway."

"Some people wanna fill the world with silly love songs. And what's wrong with that, I'd like to know," Kurt and Blaine sang together, barely able to get the words out through their giggles. 

Turning, Sebastian hugged them both close. "Go back to sleep. No more singing or I swear I'll fork myself in the throat."


	6. Epilogue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Epilogue

[2 years later]

Kurt rocked quietly. In his arms, the infant was already asleep, but he was unwilling to put her back in her cradle just yet. So pretty, so perfect, and all theirs. 

It'd been a difficult pregnancy for Blaine, especially because he had to transfer back to Dalton where madararui were known and understood. Also, where Sebastian was. The tiger was very protective of his pregnant boyfriend. 

They wanted Kurt to transfer and be with them, but Kurt couldn't leave Glee in the middle of the season, so they made the best of it on weekends and holidays. It wasn't enough, but they made due. Kurt Skyped with them every night, consoling Blaine when Sebastian upset him, which was often.

The baby, Lucy, was born just after graduation and Blaine's parents could not have been more disappointed when she took after Blaine rather than Sebastian. It didn't matter. They all wanted to move to New York to follow their dreams and none of them could ever imagine leaving Lucy behind. 

Kurt didn't say it aloud, but he would never leave his child alone with Blaine's parents. Sebastian didn't mind saying it aloud at all. 

"She asleep yet?" Sebastian asked. He stood in the doorway of the nursery, sleep rumpled and beautiful. 

"Been for a while," Kurt whispered, still rocking her. 

"You have class in the morning." 

"She'll never be a baby again." He smiled. "Just a little longer." 

"Sap." But Sebastian sat in the chair beside the crib and stretched out his legs, prepared to keep Kurt company til morning if necessary. It wouldn't be. They'd be waking Blaine to help feed her in only an hour or 2. 

"Some people wanna fill the world with silly love songs. And what's wrong with that, I'd like to know," he sang softly. "It isn't silly. No, it isn't silly. It isn't silly at all."


End file.
